Sacracment to Sins

Naive perception often delivers stupidity.
Expectation of others often comes with disappointment.
We all should have know this by now. But many times we refuse to obey such a rule.
Do we ever know how to love and take care of each others?
This, i have in doubts.
Has time and familarity defy respect and concern?
I think I am such. And I know now.

I see as much, people around us, neglected concern and care as they seek happiness in the dark.
I see as much, people beside us, humilating love and friendship as they toy emotions and feeling through their golden years.
I am of no different, no matter how hard i try to be.
We, had lost as who we are long long ago.

I see no true happiness. I see laughter broke into tears. I see myself drown and choke within this world of vanity and insanity.
Our ignorance is our sacracment to sin. Lord please forgive us.

Be gone, the root of ultimate temptations.
For the path of future lies my domination.
Lust, Greed and Wrath, sin the dirt crumbles.
Anger, Gluttony and Sloth, conjure the Abyss's rumbles
Thee man write history, shall war born cruelty.
Thus, pride yield victory, shall saints kill morailty - Samuel, the fallen.

EtErNaL DaMnAtIoN

Many times i found myself deep within this forest of conspiracy. This endless battle of wits to its final stupidity never seems to amaze and disgust me to seek alternative output of unjust hatred.
We all know where we live, stand and breathe is a place of competition. The entity of peace does not exist without war. The notion of serenity marks the next wave of chaos. Inevitably, we continue to be ravaged by this theory of both yielding and abandonment; we choose not and yet chosen many times led us to defeat and shame.
Such was the nature of human mankind. The supposed higher being of planet Earth. Entwined to this ceased to exist word, Fate.
I believed many do not believe anymore. So as I.
We dwell in Fate of what we will become one day and many times we forsaken that, actions was what make us who we are today. I took this road umpteen times to even beginning to believe I am at a point of no return. Fiery pits of hell awaiting my arrival no matter how much I repent. I am a sinner. A sinner of not able to survive this Nature of mankind. A weaker link of the race. Lesser of the damned.
What do you have to lose? To just even step out. Afraid of being wrong? Cowardice have no place for happiness and achievement but a life of mockery.
What do you have to lose? your pride? The words you breathed of eternity?
If you can compromise for all eternity, be my guest! That is your promise. You are failing people and failing yourself.

You are the greatest mockery you detested to become..

The Laughter of the Court Jester was meant for you! HahaHha - The Court Jester.

My Mask

It is a while now since i last posted here. Probably a little more than a year. Longer than i thought i would stay away from here. I am a lingerer, ghost of the past. My present haunts by my own past to it's pitiful end. Often found myself so lost in this city. As if the boy in me took over and leading its own carefree life unwilling to realise the responsibilities a person must do to contribute what he have taken and will be taking from mother Earth. Instead i hang around at this pathetic work, this la
nd of sorrow place and many many people who i wished they can just disappear over night, out of my sight, out of my world.

I am naturally a sad person deep down and if layers of layers of mask will hide that sorrow face away, I will be your joker, your fool, your moron or your listener. Over the years i developed this character in me. I am an actor of actual life, a performer to please people as much as possible. I know i have yet to perfect that skill but i am trying my very best. Every attempts are experience in every way. Every try will bring me closer to people in order for me to survive. It is not enough. I need to communicate myself to many many people as such to improve humanity in me.

After writing i feel much better. Yes, J. You continue to lie to yourself ya.

The best mask is no mask at all.- Bayushi's Lies

MudBox HomeWork

Homework from mudbox! Cow Modeling

From this


To This


This is still not finish just, just my first test test of mudbox nice right? everyone, time to pick up mudbox if you love modeling!~ then you can model all the monster, creatures, abs etc etc!~
I love Mudbox kiss kiss muack muack!~

Recent Happening - MuDbOx MoDeLiNg

yes, and i still cannot post photos in the blog. duno know what is happening.

Recently took up Mudbox Lession in CG protege. It's two months course, every monday.
Its was so much friendly than Z brush. At least the interface is so much familar. Sorry about teaching me z brush and yet i am not able to use it, dwida. Wasted your precious time.


I will be modeling a leviathan i drew out myself that i took references from ff and monster hunter monsters.
Hope i can complete this in time.

Adrian, our lecturer told us not to pick up something that is beyond our capacability for we ultimately have to hand the project up for marking and determine if you get a cert or not.

Yes i have to use flickr to get picture up my blog. Thank flickr

NoThInG sEeMs RiGhT

what has happened to blogspot? or issit my connection? mio services got problem?
damn this is been too long. i wanna post photos but its not working and i dun wana use imageshack.
anyone got any suggestions?

decided, tomorrow go down shop to help my dad. hah hope i'll be much of a help.

starting work on oct i guess. yeah i know crawling back to the same old company again. feel abit... abit... abit... i dun know what to say haha.

tomorrow will be a better day. time to get marry and settle down? damn sianz already haha i must be crazy.

What is happening to the Blogspot

Damn, cannot post pictures, then the posting interface like F**k now.
What is happening to the blogspot? Lets migrate....

Updated my deviant art today and posted some crappy shit, link my deviant page to my blog as well
and create a cheap thumb pic for the link ho ho, i must be too bored to do something like that.

am supposed to continue writing today, but the thought of Garudas... i'll probably do it in the night.
have this preety garuda in my brain haha but abit lazy to start. i know once i start, its hard to stop and
if i stop, i will stop for a long long time.

Saw her on the bus, i dodged to the upper deck with super sonic speed. she looked pale, weak and lonely ( i supposed the word was isolated )
got off the bus in a swift with my ninja move, bet she had no way to notice my existence.

Sent her a message. guessed what she replied.

"Cos my mum passed away recently"

After that, no more replies from her. Called but she never picked.
Funny? why i dodged her for what? she should be dodging me...

Her mum was a kind lady, one of the best lady in the world.
God Bless on her soul, may she rest in peace.

The Rising of the next demon shall be the next winter - Asyura Eternis